Infidelity

[Klast Brell]

The thread on politicians and infidelity got me thinking. People are so quick to slam a politician for infidelity, but how many of us are free of sin enough to cast that first stone. Now most of us are not even married. And I know marriage is a higher level of commitment. I have not cheated on my wife. But I did cheat on a couple girlfriends back in the day. I knew it was wrong, and I did it anyway. In both cases the women who I slept with knew I was in a relationship and were still willing participants in the betrayal. I also slept with a women who I knew had a boyfriend. I knew that was wrong too and I did it anyway

So how about you. Are you innocent?

[Ddrak]

Innocent, but was never really presented with the opportunity either so not gonna cry holier than thou.

Dd

[Taxious]

I've never understood infidelity. If you want to sleep around, don't be in a relationship. Why is that so hard?

[Select]

Innocent and I've been presented with the opportunity many, many times. I was also cheated on by a chronic cheater. (Should have known better when he says he cheated on his high school sweetheart he wanted to marry and had since "changed" - Dumbass I was) This is just boyfriend and girlfriend stuff, though.

Klast, you knew it was wrong but let's get past that - Why did you do it all those times? What's the motivation? I asked my ex the same thing when I confronted him and there was no straight answer. I've asked acquaintances the same and there were dodged questions. Is it pure lust? Ego? Lack of self control?

[Alluveal]

I think politicians should be held to higher standards. If they're up there talking about how great their values are, then they go bedhopping while their wife is sick with cancer, it speaks a whole hell of a lot about their character, imho.

I know we're all human, but don't run for a political office if you can't keep your dick in your pants when you're away from your wife (or, for women, if you can't keep your legs shut when the hubby isn't around.)

[Kulaf]

I myself walk on water quite frequently.......but I was banging EQ1's daughter EQ2 while still dating EQ1.

[Alluveal]

While EQ1 had cancer, I presume . . . the cancer known as POP?

[Rsak]

I think the biggest thing is that Politicians suffer because quite a few people are willing to forgive, but not forget. The lack of forgetting makes their political future difficult. The big thing with Edwards was the lying about it when directly questioned.

I think cheating is wrong, but an affair is not necessarily as long as you are clear and upfront with your spouse about what kind of rules you want to live by. If you both agree with it then it is not cheating, but you should be aware that even with communication you can still have conflicting opinions on where the relationship is heading (between spouses or between affair members).

[Embar Angylwrath]

Infidelity is just about the most emotionally hurtful thing one spouse can do to another. It destroys trust and communication, two of the fundamental things needed for any long-term relationship.

I take issue with Edawrd's characterization that he "made an error in judgement". What the fuck is that lame statement? An error in judgement is backing up into the car behind you, putting on two colors of socks, accidently putting salt in your coffee instead of sugar.. those are errors in judgment. What Edwards did, and what all people do who choose to engage in infidelity, is make a conscious decision to betray the person they are suposed to hold above all others.

Again, I ask you, if a politician will screw over their spouse, what makes you think he or she will treat you any differently when in office?

[Klast Brell]

So Embar? Can you can you clam innocence? have you ever in your life (married or just dating) been unfaithful or knowingly slept with someone who was being unfaithfull? As vehement as you are about the subject I'm guessing you got your heart torn out and kicked down the street by some boy or girl. But how about you? Have you walked the line your whole life?

[Alluveal]

God, I agree with Embar. Someone jump in here.



Why should anyone forget or forgive this? If it was just between he and his wife, hey, that's one thing. If they have an arrangement, go for it. I know people do the whole open marriage thing. Whatever floats your boat. But, don't come across as someone with upstanding morals, don't come to RELY on that image in order to make your livelihood then be utterly stupid enough to go against it.

What actually makes me laugh the most is that he is a public figure, a political figure and he does something this retarded. Why would I ever vote for someone this utterly stupid? Either he felt he was above the morality he was displaying himself, or he's a total fuckwit. Maybe it's a bit of both.

I'd probably forgive my husband if he had an affair. I would definitely make an attempt to work it out, but I sure as shit know he wouldn't be stupid enough to do it as a politician. Fuck. I'm seriously astounded at some peoples' retardation. He's up there with the assclown who was trying to pick up a gay dude in Montana or Idaho or whatever Mormon-ass state it was.

And if it that wasn't bad enough, didn't he share this hootchie mama with two of his buddies? That makes him moronic times three then, doesn't it. DURHHH, Not only will I cheat while in a high-profile public position, George, but I'll share the tart with my buddies, George . . .

God, someone give him a Darwin Award.

[Alluveal]

And to answer Klast (though he directed his comment toward Embar,) I have never cheated on my husband or on any man I was in a serious, long-term, committed relationship with. Have I been an angel on all accounts, hell no. Even if I had cheated, I'm not in frickin' office.

[Ickhor]

But, don't come across as someone with upstanding morals, don't come to RELY on that image in order to make your livelihood then be utterly stupid enough to go against it.

+1

[Partha]

Thing is, Edwards is a piece of shit. Like Tax said, if ya wanna fool around, don't get fucking married. If you ARE married and wanna fool around, then get a divorce. Especially if you're a politician.

[Arkaron]

I never have, but I'm like Dd.

One thing I will say about cheating spouses--not specifically Edwards--is that there seems to be an awful lot of "dropping the ball" between married couples. Of married female friends who find out their husband was cheating, I usually want to ask them: "When's the last time you had good sex?" "When's the last time you had a conversation that didn't end with you being a hellacious bitch?" I'm not trying to suggest it's the other partner's fault when a spouse cheats, but it's often a two way street. Of some interest to me is the double standard applied to men versus women who cheat: if a man does it, he's a horrible bastard but if a woman does it, she's often "driven to do it" by her "uncaring husband". Blah.

[Embar Angylwrath]

So Embar? Can you can you clam innocence? have you ever in your life (married or just dating) been unfaithful or knowingly slept with someone who was being unfaithfull? As vehement as you are about the subject I'm guessing you got your heart torn out and kicked down the street by some boy or girl. But how about you? Have you walked the line your whole life?

Here's the dirt on me. I think when I was 18-19 or so I had a girlfriend of a few months and slept with someone else.

After that, and as a married man, I never was unfaithful.

[Select]

Of some interest to me is the double standard applied to men versus women who cheat: if a man does it, he's a horrible bastard but if a woman does it, she's often "driven to do it" by her "uncaring husband". Blah.

That's interesting. When this topic has come up in my circles, I hear the opposite. The woman is a slut, whore, cunt, etc. The man is a shrug and a frown. "Guys do that. It sucks."

[Rsak]

Its an even worse double standard with the teacher/underage student situations. The females get next to nothing in punishment compared to the males.

[Alluveal]

I never have, but I'm like Dd.

One thing I will say about cheating spouses--not specifically Edwards--is that there seems to be an awful lot of "dropping the ball" between married couples. Of married female friends who find out their husband was cheating, I usually want to ask them: "When's the last time you had good sex?" "When's the last time you had a conversation that didn't end with you being a hellacious bitch?" I'm not trying to suggest it's the other partner's fault when a spouse cheats, but it's often a two way street. Of some interest to me is the double standard applied to men versus women who cheat: if a man does it, he's a horrible bastard but if a woman does it, she's often "driven to do it" by her "uncaring husband". Blah.

Either you are going out of your way to be a stereotypical guy, or you really buy into that shit. If a man is too big of a pussy to have a, "let's have some good sex again, or I walk" conversation with his wife, then maybe he wouldn't be going around sniffing for something else. It's simple, if he wants to get sex and isn't getting it at home AND his wife is a hellacious bitch then how about he get a big fat separation before he goes fucking his secretary? Is he too retarded to make that choice? Or too big of a coward to say, "honey, I'm done unless we get some serious sex therapy here."

If a woman does it, she's equally as moronic. I see no better or worse here depending on the gender. If you can't talk to your spouse about sex, if you argue all the time and don't get past it, get a goddamned divorce, and keep your pants on until you are legally separated. Most guys that I know that CLAIM to be "driven to having an affair" gasp at the thought of actually bringing it up to their wives, or can't leave "because of the kids." Bullshit. All of it. Same for women.

If a guy had balls, he would just say, "yes I fucked someone else while I was married. I was an inconsiderate asshole." Not, "Oh, poor me, my wife never puts out and I'm too big of a pussy to actually try and fix the problem or move on."

[Alluveal]

Its an even worse double standard with the teacher/underage student situations. The females get next to nothing in punishment compared to the males.

God that absolutely infuriates me. Pretty blonde girl. Awww, she can't go to prison because she seduced a 14 year old. Poor baby might break a nail or her roots might start showing because she can't get to the salon. Look at those big blue eyes. Poor baby. Poor poor baby.