Any coffee geeks out there?

[Freecare Spiritwise]

Dammit, it didn't take Mrs. Clutz very long to break the bottom glass container on the new bean grinder. Oh well, at least the apology nooner was good.

Nothing like sex in the middle of the day.

Best part about working from home

[Freecare Spiritwise]

Did you ever read Voltaire's "Candide"?
He says live life at Benny Hill freak out speed
Not a quote of what he wrote but a paraphrase
Make it up as you go Keyser Soze
Highlights yes but don't underline 'em
Just live for N.O.W. like Gloria Steinem
Life is like Marion Barry
It's not all that it's cracked up to be
Like Fred Sanford when the big one comes
Find the meaning of life is there is none
It's twenty-four hours when you call it a day
Be Frank and say "I Did It My Way"
Don't give a flying nun no don't give a Gidget
Just have more fun than a well-oiled midget
If life were picture perfect you could frame it
But the world is a diaper so let someone else change it

All born equal unless you're Canadian
Then halfway through decay like Uranium
You define what's death-defying
Get the most out of life or at the least die trying
Are you Evil Knievel jumping a train?
Or running with scissors like Frasier Crane?
Have really good times doing really bad things
Cause the show ain't over 'til the fat lady sings
Like Elton John with his candle in the wind
It's hard to blow out a flame as big as him
But we've all got to Wang Chung with the Grim Reaper
Whether you're Einstein whether you're Beaker
Death is certain so it's definitely worth flirtin'
Don't expect a bright light no, just curtains
Life is like a penis most people don't know it
But most people suck so they usually blow it

[Ariannda Kusanagi]

Dammit, it didn't take Mrs. Clutz very long to break the bottom glass container on the new bean grinder. Oh well, at least the apology nooner was good.

Nothing like sex in the middle of the day.

Best part about working from home

God that didn't take long at ALL ! My ex husband would have liked a quickie before work, one at lunch, one when he came home and good sex before he went to bed.... every day

[Klast Brell]

Did you ever read Voltaire's "Candide"?
He says live life at Benny Hill freak out speed
Not a quote of what he wrote but a paraphrase
Make it up as you go Keyser Soze
Highlights yes but don't underline 'em
Just live for N.O.W. like Gloria Steinem
Life is like Marion Barry
It's not all that it's cracked up to be
Like Fred Sanford when the big one comes
Find the meaning of life is there is none
It's twenty-four hours when you call it a day
Be Frank and say "I Did It My Way"
Don't give a flying nun no don't give a Gidget
Just have more fun than a well-oiled midget
If life were picture perfect you could frame it
But the world is a diaper so let someone else change it

All born equal unless you're Canadian
Then halfway through decay like Uranium
You define what's death-defying
Get the most out of life or at the least die trying
Are you Evil Knievel jumping a train?
Or running with scissors like Frasier Crane?
Have really good times doing really bad things
Cause the show ain't over 'til the fat lady sings
Like Elton John with his candle in the wind
It's hard to blow out a flame as big as him
But we've all got to Wang Chung with the Grim Reaper
Whether you're Einstein whether you're Beaker
Death is certain so it's definitely worth flirtin'
Don't expect a bright light no, just curtains
Life is like a penis most people don't know it
But most people suck so they usually blow it

I have never heard that song,, but I can tell by the lyrics being a giant list of similes that it's rap. Am I right?

[Klast Brell]

So your husband was a man. What's your point?

[Select]

So your husband was a man. What's your point?

Guys my age must be little boys then. Girlfriends keep complaining (I did too for awhile) about the dudes lasting under two minutes and then they're too sensitive for the rest of the day. Maybe they'll last longer when us ladies are older and sagging everywhere.

[Taxious]

So your husband was a man. What's your point?

Guys my age must be little boys then. Girlfriends keep complaining (I did too for awhile) about the dudes lasting under two minutes and then they're too sensitive for the rest of the day. Maybe they'll last longer when us ladies are older and sagging everywhere.

That's two different issues. Not lasting a long time means you are doing something right. Being too sensitive to go again means you are doing something wrong.

[Klast Brell]

Some guys last longer than others. Some women come faster or more easily than others. Maybe it's genetics. I dated a woman for a while that surely must have been the female equivalent of a premature ejaculator. She would have about once orgasm every minute while we were having sex. Not faking either. We dated too long and the relationship was too serious for her to have a reason to keep up an act like that. I knew it was nothing about me. She was just different that way. She knew it was abnormal as well. She would laugh about it and say, "Its not you. Its me". Still I felt pretty proud of myself every time we finished.

After dating her I felt completely inadequate with other women. It took me a while to stop felling like I was bad in bed because I could only make them come once or twice.

[Freecare Spiritwise]

The song is Take the Long Way Home by The Bloodhound Gang. The album is called Hooray for Boobies

[Select]

That's two different issues. Not lasting a long time means you are doing something right.

Uh, it's still doing it wrong if it's under a freaking minute. The chicks are not likely to get anywhere unless they're wired weird like Klast's lady. The guys who last under a minute will usually make up for it by going for about 5 seconds, stopping for like a minute because they're too close, and then repeating the whole thing all over again. It ends up lasting for forever but it's terrible sex. Girlfriends usually tell the guys, "Dude, you suck in bed. Work on this or we're done." I love that the women in my life are confident enough not to take the blame for someone else's sexual inadequacies. Again, maybe it's because we're young. All my girlfriends are beautiful ladies and the guys tell them they're super tight - almost too tight for the guys to handle.

Some guys last longer than others. Some women come faster or more easily than others. Maybe it's genetics.

Some guys are shitty in bed. Some women are shitty in bed. There's a line that gets crossed and it's just too soon and the person just fucking sucks. If it's genetics, then they're likely doomed to be shitty in bed for life.

It took me a while to stop felling like I was bad in bed because I could only make them come once or twice.

Haha, you're fine. Again, the common complaint amongst my girlfriends is they don't often get there. Usually it's the guy, because once they shop around, they'll land a few successful hits with other people. I thought nerds were supposed to be secretly good in bed. Art school sucks.

[Embar Angylwrath]

Question: What's the best way to satisfy a woman in bed?

Answer: Who fucking cares?

[Select]

Answer: Who fucking cares?

How useful if people didn't have delicate self esteems that are easy to dig at.

[Ariannda Kusanagi]

I agree with Select on the stopping and restarting business. It's REALLY frusterating for the woman on the other end as well. I briefly dated a guy who lated 2 minutes, EVERY time and had like a full body orgasm and thought it was some sort of wondrous thing and would like pet my hair and croon. Needless to say after about the 3rd time I looked at him and I said "Is that it ? I mean isn't something supposed to happen, period ? 2 minutes of sex is not sex, it's pathetic". Needless to say he got all offended and we didn't last too much longer, but it was WEIRD ! Another guy I've been with did that stop and go thing. I mean it's really NOT good sex. My ex husband would last a very short time and then he was good to go for a much longer time. I think several hours every time is a bad thing, but several minutes is a bad thing as well. And my ex husband isn't a man he's overactive man, as he actively tried to get sex all day every day, mostly from me =p Hell he's still trying to get sex all the time, still mostly from me

[Harlowe]

This thread needs to be disinfected now.

[Embar Angylwrath]

Him: Hey babe, I wan't some anal.

Her: You know I don't like that.

Him: You're so selfish, why does it always have to be about you?

[Partha]

That's why I prefer extended petting. Well, besides the fact that extended petting is fun in and of itself.

[Klast Brell]

Petting? Isn't that what they called foreplay in the 1950's.

BTW: Do you count dining at the Y as foreplay or sex?

[Freecare Spiritwise]

I thought foreplay was 20 minutes of begging?

[Select]

Petting? Isn't that what they called foreplay in the 1950's.

Seriously.

Him: You're so selfish, why does it always have to be about you?

Hahahaha, who the fuck does that work on?

[Harlowe]

Petting? Isn't that what they called foreplay in the 1950's.

Yes this. I've never heard anyone use that expression, well other than in a movie that was depicting the 50's.

Petting Zoo's = Foreplay with Animals.